You Can’t Progress if You Can’t Connect

Fake it till you make it?

Hi Folks,

Allow me to begin with a story…

Once, I knew a girl who was regarded as the sweetest person one could ever meet. She always wore a smile and had kind words for anyone she encountered. She was prepared with a couple of jokes at gatherings and had a few party tricks up her sleeve. To the casual observer, she appeared to be the epitome of charm and perfection.

However, upon getting to know her better, one would notice something amiss. The interactions felt hollow, and the compliments lacked sincerity. It became evident that she had rehearsed routines and jokes. Additionally, whenever a conversation became serious, whether one-on-one or in a group, she would crack jokes to deflect from the topic at hand. She only felt at ease in superficial environments where she could impress and entertain others.

As she grew older, she found success in sales but encountered limitations when it came to assuming leadership positions. While she remained a skilled salesperson with a decent income, she found herself stuck at that level.

Have you ever encountered individuals like this in your life? People who, despite seeming perfect and possessing a charming personality, hit a ceiling?

Alternatively, perhaps you cannot relate to this specific example, but you have observed confident, charming, and charismatic individuals stagnating in mediocrity, while others who may appear “ordinary” or even somewhat “flawed” surpass them and achieve more?

How does this happen? Let’s continue the story…

In one-on-one selling, charming someone into making a purchase and ensuring their satisfaction with compliments and small gestures posed no problem for her. She even received numerous referrals, which kept her going.

However, leadership necessitates establishing connections with fellow human beings. It requires the ability to inspire trust and exhibit genuine authenticity. Every true leader possesses some human qualities and acknowledges their flaws. Followers need to grasp the leader’s essence, understand their values, comprehend their vision for the team, and recognize how they can collectively achieve their goals. Simply being a charming individual with a constant smile and flattering remarks is no longer sufficient for effective leadership. Leaders cannot tell people what they want to hear and expect them to move in the same direction; only those who share alignment move in harmony. Exceptional leaders are honest with themselves and others. Even average leaders who display vulnerability and acknowledge their insecurities gather willing followers.


What about the phrase “Fake It Until You Make It”?

You may be familiar with the popular expression of “faking it until you make it.” Allow me to clarify. This strategy works when you are “faking” your confidence, optimism, or competence in order to motivate yourself and others to pursue your goals.

However, when it comes to long-term relationships—be it in business, personal relationships, or family—leadership demands that you cannot fabricate your values, vision, or connections with those involved. Attempting to deceive others in these aspects is equivalent to lying and being deceitful.


“Faking It” is not the same as being a Fake Person.

I hope I have brought clarity to this well-known phrase today, and I encourage you to add a new phrase to your repertoire: “To Progress, You Need to Connect.”

Remember, we are discussing long-term endeavors here—your business, your family, your relationships. To make progress, you must establish genuine connections.

Need help to lead your team to build a business that runs without you?  Register NOW for our FREE Business Optimization Clinic, valued at RM750. We guarantee you will get at least 1-2 ideas you can implement immediately, even if you do not engage our services.

Have a profitable week ahead!

The Familybiz Works Team

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